-Emotional responsiveness: the willingness to tune into you emotionally, and to allow themselves to tune into your non verbals or words and to allow themselves to feel what youre feeling and who respond to that in a way that you feel that you matter
Conflict is the virus, the inflammation is the emotional disconnection. You cant connect to the person & cant get them to respond to you. The person is in the room but theyre not paying attention to you.
couple: 1 demanding and getting angry 2 defending and distancing
what 1 really saying is where are you where are you
im all by myself, he doesnt care about me, im not important to him, and that im by myself --> desperation under the anger