I’m sorry to every version of myself and most importantly to the 15 y/o me. Because things didn’t get better. You just learn how to shove it down and go on each day as if all is well. You just learn how to cope in isolation, telling yourself day after day, year after day that things will get better. And before you know it you dread of things ‘getting better’ because you know how short lived it is and nothing hurts more than getting on that high for a moment only to fall back down into desolation in a few days. You learn to accept feeling indifferent is better than going through that again and again and again
