Asking myself "is this helping me get what I want" is becoming one of my favourite questions.
It works on kids too. Mine are 11 and soon to be 10. Whenever they start fighting, I ask them, "Is this helping you get what you want?" and it gives them the power to remember what they are really trying to accomplish. "You can argue with your brother about whether it's a chair or a stool, or you can get what you want."
Don't lose sight on what you want to achieve. Every action is a step toward or away from you what you want.
"One great portfolio manager I know told the story of being driven somewhere by an analyst on a rainy night when a truck swerved and almost ran them off the road. “Why is stuff like this always happening to me?” the analyst instinctively responded. But to the portfolio manager, that response reflected a terrible mindset, whether on the road or in the market: a sense that the world is acting on you as opposed to your acting on the world. It is a mindset that is hard to change. But from what I’ve seen, great investors don’t have it. Instead, they’ve come to understand which factors in the market they can control and which factors they cannot."
— Graham Duncan
“Once upon a time, there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work.
One day, as he was walking along the shore, he looked down the beach and saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself at the thought of someone who would dance to the day, and so, he walked faster to catch up.
As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young man, and that what he was doing was not dancing at all. The young man was reaching down to the shore, picking up small objects, and throwing them into the ocean.
He came closer still and called out "Good morning! May I ask what it is that you are doing?"
The young man paused, looked up, and replied "Throwing starfish into the ocean."
"I must ask, then, why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?" asked the somewhat startled wise man.
To this, the young man replied, "The sun is up and the tide is going out. If I don't throw them in, they'll die."
Upon hearing this, the wise man commented, "But, young man, do you not realize that there are miles and miles of beach and there are starfish all along every mile? You can't possibly make a difference!"
At this, the young man bent down, picked up yet another starfish, and threw it into the ocean. As it met the water, he said,
"It made a difference for that one.”
― Loren Eiseley
“In short, “getting it together” requires slowing the mind. Quieting the mind means less thinking, calculating, judging, worrying, fearing, hoping, trying, regretting, controlling, jittering or distracting. The mind is still when it is totally here and now in perfect oneness with the action
and the actor. It is the purpose of the Inner Game to increase the frequency and duration of these moments, quieting the mind by degrees and realizing thereby a continual expansion of our ability to learn and perform.” - Timothy Gallwey
“As I tell our people constantly: we’ve all learned to answer email on Sundays, but none of us has learned to go to the movies on Monday afternoon.”
— Ricardo Semler, Maverick!