10 Steps to Letting Go of Resentment
Approach resentment as the addictive state of mind it is.
Realize that you are using resentment to replicate old dramas and acknowledge that you cannot change the past.
Examine how your resentment may come from mentally confusing people in your present life with people from your past.
Acknowledge that you cannot control those who have rejected you.
Recognize that your resentment gives you only illusions of strength. Instead, highlight and validate your real strength and power.
Learn to identify signals that provoke resentment. Apply the acronym HALT, widely used in 12-step programs: Hungry, Angry, Lonely, and Tired.
Practice cognitive behavioral techniques to stop indulging in resentment. Put a thought between your feelings of resentment and indulging in ruminating about them.
Acknowledge your part in allowing the abuse to occur, forgive yourself for that, and make a decision to not let it occur again.
Declare an amnesty with the person you resent and with yourself.
Forgive when you can, and practice willful and deliberate forgetfulness when you cannot, keeping in mind that these acts are gifts to yourself rather than capitulation to the people you resent.