I don’t think I’ve learned how to cope with the grief of once knowing someone so intimately that their life was deeply intertwined with mine, that so much of what we did was together and interrelated and shared. And now they are a stranger. Almost completely removed from my life except for the parts of me that are shaped by them. I don’t really know how to make sense of it. They only exist in memories and photos and songs and places. I don’t really know how to cope with their absence other than just accepting it. Living through it and finding ways to make peace. Releasing, shedding, letting go. I don’t know how to understand the passing of time and all the space that exists between us since our paths separated. That space used to be a bridge. That space used to be an opening and entryway and rite of passage for connection. That space used to be the space created by lovers or best friends or whatever we once were. Now it just doesn’t exist. But I find myself trying to reach across it. Sometimes I even try taking a step and I just fall. Fall into empty space. A pool where my grief lives.