feeling avoidant, im just tired and preemptively wary. and feeling guilty for it. nervous to deal w whatever comes with me not being impressed, im just tired and need to not keep playing chess with jill and bob. was going to work out and go to the pool to tan but it's raining. i think im afraid of him turning out to be yet another boring man. i have to pack everything up today because tomorrow i have drs appt and my final goodbye to casa 2. i really cannot live my life when im hungry.. again, [actions]. one ball at a time. my phone's dead I want to keep it dead forever

really stuck on m but hopefully it regulates when I see him in person in three days, reminder to tell him to pick me up in uber tonight instead of lugging carry on to union, this is the first time im not jumping to tell enrique and seb bc idk how

joseph beuys reminds me 'actions' - actions accumulate to make your life.
from center
it is so nice to have ppl who know you and can vouch for you
"watch out for that one she's a handful" "told me that I was NOT your type"
from center problem? or should be called 'if you're in it you can't look at it' or 'if you're experiencing it truthfully you cannot see what it looks like from the outside" so like. into / onto
or within / onto

each action an object, each object into a ball/basket/wooden trough. but first you have to see them as actions, then as objects.

feeling -> function -> form