This doesn't feel like a collapse.
Collapses have weight. They increase density. Collapses bend spacetime, they pull all around them inside. Collapses suck out the light.
No, my darling. There's no event horizon here. No danger. No terror.
No. This feels like a dispersal. Not an explosion. A drift. The natural order. All things experience an attraction, and then all things fall away, and stand, at the end, alone.
A steady rain of atoms, untouching and untouched. Falling, with no place beneath, into infinity. Infinitely.
No, my love. Explosions produce heat. This is cold. The death of heat. Entropy. The end of all.
The stuff of all things, neither created nor destroyed, and yet nothing is made. All is one, and so everything is nothing.
If there is hope, it is the hope of the random movement, the swerve of Lucretius. Clinamen. Unseeable, unknowable, except in looking back over the path taken, the collisions created. And yet without those collisions, nothing exists.
Let us swerve, my darling. Together or apart. But let us collide.
You walked up to us in the hallway and said, “Excuse me, I’ve never willingly engaged in conversation with police officers, but may I ask your perspective on what’s going on?” The officers replied that they do not condone what the officer did in Minnesota. “He should be in Jail for life,” they said. And, “If that were my partner, I’d have pulled him away.”
“But,” they added, “what is happening now is not helping. It pulls the attention away from the issue at hand.”
You replied, “I’ve been thrown on the ground outside of my mother’s house when I came to pick up my baby brother for softball practice because I ‘fit the description’ of two black men, surrounded by six cruisers. I understand the rage that people must feel.”
“I am just a 25-year-old man, but I’ve had 25 years of being afraid of making the wrong move and losing my life. I am just a 25-year-old man and I don’t pretend to have the answers, but maybe, just maybe this will raise awareness for people that this has to change.”
We discussed the history of violence against black Americans. We discussed the initiatives already at play to strengthen communities and combat ignorance. We discussed how some people may never change but that can’t stop us from doing what’s right.
One officer stated that she says hello to people in the street because maybe that person will walk away and think, “Wow, an officer has never said hello to me before, I’m going to start saying hello to them more.”
You replied, “Look, at the end of the day, you’re human, I’m human, and I hope we can just see each other as such.”
You may be ‘just’ a 25-year-old man, but your voice has enormous power to promote change for good.
Here we are again. Last time we broke up, and it's been about as long since we've spoken, but not a day has gone by that I haven't thought about you. There were so many things working against us and probably still are, I'm not sure we could ever make it work, but I miss you. Our chemistry was undeniable and sometimes I think I'd drop it all to be with you again.