Thoughts are never honest. Emotions are. Do not go around asking for honesty in what people think; much of what they perceive as thinking is empty anyway because it’s thought out again and again and comes out refined and muddy. The ones who know how to feel might have to say to you a couple of interesting things or not and when they do that, you ought to know how to listen. So learn how to listen. You can’t make someone open up about their feelings in case they don’t want to. But you can remain open yourself through listening deeply and completely; they might want to talk about the weather and keep it simple — allow them to feel the simplicity…Emotion pours out directly or indirectly each time people engage themselves in the process of genuine interaction.
Skip the whole “Minimal Viable Product” thing. It leads to incrementalism. Try “Maximum Fucking Love.” It leads to something that someone else might actually care about.
We construct the experience of time in our minds, so it follows that we are able to change the elements we find troubling — whether it’s trying to stop the years racing past, or speeding up time when we’re stuck in a queue, trying to live more in the present, or working out how long ago we last saw our old friends.
Time perception matters because it is the experience of time that roots us in our mental reality.
Time is not only at the heart of the way we organise life, but the way we experience it.
'Mind Time' is the elasticity of how we experience time. We slow time down when gripped by mortal fear — the cliche about the slow-motion car crash is, in fact, a cognitive reality. This plays out even in situations that aren’t life-or-death per se but are still associated with strong feelings of fear. Hammond points to a study in which people with arachnophobia were asked to look at spiders — the very object of their intense fear — for 45 seconds and they overestimated the elapsed time. The same pattern was observed in novice skydivers, who estimated the duration of their peers’ falls as short, whereas their own, from the same altitude, were deemed longer.
As we grow older, we tend to feel like the previous decade elapsed more rapidly, while the earlier decades of our lives seem to have lasted longer.
It is as though time has been compressed and — as if looking through a telescope — things seem closer than they really are.
The most straightforward explanation for it is called the clarity of memory hypothesis, proposed by the psychologist Norman Bradburn in 1987. This is the simple idea that because we know that memories fade over time, we use the clarity of a memory as a guide to its recency. So if a memory seems unclear we assume it happened longer ago.
We are most likely to vividly remember experiences we had between the ages of 15 and 25. The big news events that we remember best tend to have happened earlier in the bump, while our most memorable personal experiences are in the second half.
Memory and identity are so closely intertwined, it is in those formative years, when we’re constructing our identity and finding our place in the world, that our memory latches onto particularly vivid details in order to use them later in reinforcing that identity. People who undergo a major transformation of identity later in life — say, changing careers or coming out — tend to experience a second identity bump, which helps them reconcile and consolidate their new identity.
THE HOLIDAY PARADOX:
The contradictory feeling that a good holiday whizzes by, yet feels long when you look back. Like the reminiscence bump, the Holiday Paradox has to do with the quality and concentration of new experiences, especially in contrast to familiar daily routines.
Roald Dahl on the big ideas coming from little things —
“Ideas come from tiny germs and you rattle it around and hope for the best and build up a story.”
Dahl was a kid he attended Repton School in Derbyshire. There, Cadbury would occasionally send the kids boxes of chocolate for review. This sounds like a dream, but Dahl couldn’t help but wonder what was behind the chocolates in the box. How were they made? Did they have a special story? These questions which seem insignificant led to him developing a fascination with chocolate and later writing the famous book, “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.”
no matter where you move
what job you take
what friends come in and out of your life
partnered or single
you will keep running into yourself.
over and over and over.
as quickly as you meet yourself,
brush it off, give yourself a curt nod,
and proceed as if you have never met that person
that stands squarely in the mirror,
staring back at you.
as the human nature goes on...
seasons of the heart pass through us
you will meet yourself again
much like the bathroom mirror after a hot shower,
it's clouded, milky, frosted.
you can wipe it down momentarily to catch a glimpse.
only to be restored to an obfuscated state.
of being. of knowing.
always, you remember the face.
but forget the name, the context, the importance --
‘The real issue is people becoming detached from reality. The more you live your life through screens the more your life can be dictated by those who control what goes on those screens.
Talk to anyone who isn’t extremely online and they don’t give a shit about any of this stuff.’
"...we were interested in what enables technology to profoundly disappear and let you look through the information or look through the interface onto the domain – just like how the blind man’s eyes are now touching the concrete, so to speak. The technology disappears in the same way that the cane disappears. So we were exploring how we might design technology that lets us look through the screen instead of at the screen and then play with the information as if there’s no screen there at all."