"Think of yourself as one of those Olympic swimmers who always has spare googles for when one of their's snaps just before they enter the pool"
" He does his Vinegar work to put the cork up Leo's nose "
" One of the unique footballers in world football – puts in hyphens and semicolons – Busquets "
" Espanyol hanging in there like loose teeth "
" Messi sends his shadow the wrong way "
" They are coming at Celta Vigo like marbles on a glass table "
" Suarez has an eye for goal like the cyclops "
"Gareth cuts his spam beautifully fine, so fine you can see through it "
" Alba steers this one home with the accuracy of William Tell and splits the apple "
" Alba tells Leo, throw me the keys buddy and I'll drive this one home "
“ That shot passes between the devil and the deep blue sea for Barca “
" Smooth as glass Gareth Bale "
" Gareth Bale needs Benzema like a shark needs a dentist "
" 4 players inside a telephone box but Messi don't care "
" Gareth onto it like Dracula onto a plate of liver"