"Relationships are meant to constrain," Schwartz told me, "but if you're always on the look out for better, such constraints are experienced with bitterness and resentment."
"She did not live life on the surface."
is it a little embarrassing to yearn
(lately I've been thinking about awkward, embarrassing moments that are amusingly human)
“Being able to feel safe with other people is probably the single most important aspect of mental health; safe connections are fundamental to meaningful and satisfying lives. Numerous studies of disaster response around the globe have shown that social support is the most powerful protection against becoming overwhelmed by stress and trauma.
Social support is not the same as merely being in the presence of others. The critical issue is reciprocity: being truly heard and seen by the people around us, feeling that we are held in someone else’s mind and heart. For our physiology to calm down, heal, and grow we need a visceral feeling of safety. “
- Bessel A. van der Kolk, The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma