PHYSICAL MEMORY
- Use of the body, psychomotor skills, exercises, dance, use of hands, sex, etc. / ancient expressions: sex, fight, dance, crafting.
- Physical sensations body can memorize: tension, heaviness, lightness, ease, etc.
CHEMICAL MEMORY
- Food (feeding) - Emotions (experiences, memories, traumas), breathing?
- Chemical sensations body can memorize: happiness, love, fear, sadness, pleasure, laziness, etc.
- Being sensations created by chemistry can create "dependency" in our bodies or minds.
BREATHING
- The "rhythm" of the body: faster breathing = tension, strength, energy, etc // slower breathing = calm, tranquility, sleep, etc.
- Link between the mind and the body: breathing is automatic in the body, but it can also be done consciously from the mind.
INFLUENCERS
- External factors: The physical world, our environment, space / Ejm: Danger = tension and agitation
- Internal factors: The internal world, our thoughts / Ejm: Anxiety = tension and agitation
- Repetition: If you start to experiment frequently a physical sensation, thought or action, it will be recorded in "the body memory" automatically and will start to creating patterns, routes, whether they are healthy or harmful for you. // See:
Macro cycles from the body
- There is no hierarchy between external / internal factors, memory and the body, none will always be the main cause of the other / well the body can begin to influence our inner world, or vice versa, perhaps even all together (physical action - chemical- respiration -memory - external f. - internal f.), everything is hyperconnected.

The body memory

Under the CT scan, I was very, very calm. It seems that I only reach this state while I'm being tattooed or doing a tomography, when all I have to focus on is my body and keeping incredibly still. I'm speaking flippantly but it was in truth my first time and I was, before I relaxed into it, terrified — the way I am of all medical things which is precisely what has stopped me from going to the doctor practically all my life.

They injected something into my arm which made my body feel all hot inside, the exact way I imagine a fire spreads through a house. I imagined looking at a map, hurricanes lighting up the danger spots until there are saturated swirls of colour. And I thought to myself: for all I have tried to give and do in my life, is this it? Am I rotting from the inside?

I've spent a lot of time joking about death. Let's just end it now, I'd say. That's my bus! As a teenager and in my early twenties, I also contemplated dying an unusual amount, whether it was because of the pain or the numbness. There were few wins although I also threw myself into my life as best as I could but even now, I don't think a day goes by when I don't think about death. I don't really care if that's normal or not. Who's to say anymore?

But still — when faced with the real possibility of it, with it breathing down my neck in a tangible, corporeal way that wasn't arbitrary and down to chance like getting hit by a coconut on the wrong part of my skull, or slipping down the stairs... yeah, I was fucking scared. I don't want to curse myself, but I've always wondered if I'd be that one in a million with the tumour or however the statistic goes.

And so I lay there, holding my breath, the bed moving backwards and forwards and following the commands. Whatever they injected me with felt like it was malting, like my own internal lava. When I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, my arms looked frail, freckled with little stickers covering the punctures of the needles. What is brewing inside of me, I thought, not a bolt of lightning as all the electric stories go but perhaps always this. A dormant volcano, bubbling and beautiful but always on the cusp of eternal eruption.

Body Lava