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wtf is love
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| The Possessed, Elif Batuman
| The Possessed, Elif Batuman

To be desired is perhaps the closest anybody in this life can reach to feeling immortal.

| John Berger

2

My amazing boyfriend of going on three years, who I know is plotting a proposal, lights up when I wake up in the mornings, because now we can hang out. He tells me at least once a day how much he loves me and how much joy I bring him, he thinks that nearly everything I do is adorable and delights in it, he does things for me just because he knows I'll appreciate them having been done. It was weird at first! As someone who had been into ~ flinchy dudes in the past, and as someone who had never been loved or IN love before and to whom exuberant affection and affirmation did not come naturally, there was a nonzero amount of self-reflection and choice involved in taking him seriously and letting it fuel my own delight and confidence and love for him rather than Getting Weird About It. And the skeptical version of me isn't wrong, it IS delusion-- I am a perfectly loveable person, sure, but I am obviously not the goddess he worships me as. He is a wonderful man, but I probably do not need to be tearing up in the middle of the workday because I randomly thought about how much I love him. But who cares? Happy, healthy love is building a religion together. All religions are a lot of nonsense, but they are also very, very real. Like Polly says, it's about belief. We all deserve to love true believers, and to become ones ourselves.

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Nothing you become will disappoint me; I have no preconception that I’d like to see you be or do. I have no desire to foresee you, only to discover you. You can’t disappoint me.

Mary Haskell in a letter to Kahlil Gibr…

"If I truly love one person I love all persons, I love the world, I love life. If I can say to somebody else, 'I love you,' I must be able to say, 'I love you in everybody, I love you through the world, I love you in also myself'."

"The Art of Loving" by Erich Fromm
Love
Love
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this-is-about-more-than-who-we-fuck-and…
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"god im reading a text about romance fiction (especially targeted at young adults) for class and one sentence in it literally made my brain explode because ive been thinking about this kind of stuff too, how “Many people wouldn’t fall in love if they’ve never heard about it before.” and like…imagine there was no ideal/overaccentuated image of love and romance painted in postmodern mass media….how would we love? would it be purer? more authentic? what would we do differently? would we fall in love at all if we werent constantly being fed an ideal concept of love as the norm in mass media? like what is a natural process of human feelings and what is just a projection of how we want to love and want to be loved based on what we’ve seen on tv and read in books etc? in this essay i will"

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