i'm writing to you from the taxi to the airport. i thought it would be sad, but right now it's just scary. the sad will probably hit in a few hours, once i'm safely on the plane (fingers crossed). i shouldn't be that sad anyways, i know i'll be back. and i have a lot to look forwards to. i think it's just the sort of thing that one ought to feel sad about, which is really a very silly way to relate to feelings. anyway, more later, this tiny square textbox on my phone is quite cramped

leaving taipei tomorrow morning. went through a lot of feelings today, as i was going through all the chores involved in leaving (getting a covid test, cancelling my phone and internet, putting my stuff in storage)

for a while in the morning, there was just the overwhelming feeling of floating, that i have no idea what i'm doing next and no anchors.

then i started to look at backpacking in europe in june, and i'm feeling a lot better about things. i can float around for a little while, in beautiful nature, carrying my life on my back.

a interesting thing about zulip is that threads are uniquely identified by name, so if two people happen to make a thread with the same name years apart, the messages will appear next to each other.

i did a double-take today seeing my own message from 2019 in the #never graduate week > Feelings Check-In, NGW Edition thread, talking about whether the number of people RSVPed would fit in the room we had booked. it's been a long time since i've had to think about anything like that.

i guess i'll go to the online one, this year. i sure have been having a lot of feelings recently.